Metropolitan Rural

Country Boy Explains Life in the Big City
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Archive for the ‘my life’

It’s Been Quite a Year!

December 03, 2009 By: Curtis Category: my life 1 Comment →

I had know idea that this year would turn out this way.

February- We went to the Unschool Winter Waterpark Gathering in Sandusky, OH and had a blast hanging around with friends.

May/June- I went on a 3 week, around the world business trip with stops in London, Cape Town, Johannesburg and Sydney.

August- My son and I spent 4 days at GenCon Indy playing card games, making boffers, trying out new video games and just generally having fun.

September - Two more weeks abroad, back to  Cape Town and Johannesburg this time and got to sit in a safari truck on a road surrounded by 20-25 wild elephants in Kruger National Park.  Found out I’ll likely be making trips to New Zealand and Thailand next year as well.

October - Another week of vacation.  This time the Beach Unschool Gathering outside of Charleston, SC.  Got back together with lots of other unschool dads who all seem to work from home full-time (not fair!). 

November- Won my first card game tournament for World of Warcraft TCG that my son and I have been playing for the last year.

In other news:

  • My brother finally made it home from his work assignment in Beijing
  • My in-laws are 99% positive they are retiring next year and wanting us to plan moving to SC with them in a couple of years
  • I started up a small website to sell cards from our game
  • My son performed in 3 musicals this year: Narnia, Oliver and Annie
  • I signed up to tutor online at eduFire
  • Our neighborhood association president passed away unexpectedly from a high fever after years of battling lupus
  • Our neighborhood was also voted the #1 place to live by the Riverfront Times this year as well.

Not sure how we managed to fit all that stuff in this year, but we did. 

Making a Connection

December 10, 2008 By: Curtis Category: fun, my life No Comments →

A couple of weeks ago I was finally inspired by a friend I had met at the unschooling conference we attended back in September. Rob and his family live in northern Illinois. I was impressed that he had taken the time to learn Yu-Gi-Oh to play with his youngest son. He spent several hours of the conference in the game room with the kids playing.

The kid and the wife had both bought decks of the World of Warcraft trading card game a while back and they had played on occasion. The boy was asking more and more to play of late. So, before he left for his Dad’s for Thanksgiving, I told him that when he got back he could teach me how to play and I even volunteered to take him to a weekly game night at a mall store in south county.

So, this past weekend I sat down and started learning. If you haven’t read one, the instruction manual that comes with these starter decks, isn’t worth didley squat. The thing is horribly ambiguous and expects you to know all about the rules of these games before you sit down to play. We fumbled our way through a couple of games over the weekend with minimal arguments over our interpretations of the rules.

Last night was the big night of playing out at the store. Due to the holiday and lack of space, a lot of people didn’t show up, so there was only 1 other person there. He was a pretty nice guy who helped us out a lot learning the rules better, giving us pointers on “building a deck”, and some etiquette along the way. We had a lot of fun being out together and learning. I’m glad I got the nerve to just do it and spend some more time with him. Thanks Rob.

My Hometown in Weird Missouri

November 03, 2008 By: Curtis Category: fun, my life No Comments →

Last Thursday evening we were out and about in the county and swung into a Barnes & Noble bookstore. On the way out, I noticed a pile of books titled Weird Missouri: Your Travel Guide to Missouri’s Local Legends and Best Kept Secrets (Weird). I had a sneaking suspicion that my home town would be listed in there somewhere.

I picked up a copy and flipped to the table of contents. There was a special section on cemeteries. Flipping to the page, I found the short 2 paragraphs about my home town of 632 people.

The little cometary at the edge of town is known locally for it’s glowing tombstones. You drive by on a clear night and see a few of the tombstones sort of flash as you pass them. Of course, if you get out and stand still they actually stay on and appear to glow. It’s that way on a clear moonless night as well. That’s about as far as the book goes. The whole story, of course, always comes with a legend. As ours goes, the original glowing tombstone was that of a woman who had lost her husband in the Civil War. She was not convinced her husband had died and waited up every night on the porch with a lantern, hoping for him to come home. She still stays up at nights with her lantern even now waiting for him.

Aren’t legends fun? While I’m not aware of any detailed investigation into the cause of the glowing tombstones, I’ve always assumed there is some sort of phosphorescent material in the rock that picks up sunlight during the day and shines it back out at night. Regardless, it was still fun to see a blurb about my tiny little hometown in a book at a major book store.

The Great Wall

October 21, 2008 By: Curtis Category: my life No Comments →

On a completely new topic, I got a picture from my brother yesterday.  He’s currently in Beijing, China on a 6 month work assignment.  He finally got around to doing some sight seeing now that all the Olympic visitors have cleared out of the city.  He sent me this totally awesome picture he took last weekend of the Great Wall.  I couldn’t resist sharing it.

 great-wall.JPG

Where Did It Go?

October 15, 2008 By: Curtis Category: city living, my life 1 Comment →

What ever happened to our sense of personal responsibility? It seems every day I see more people who are so totally self absorbed they ignore the needs of others.

  • There was the man who tried to cross the street without a signal and held up traffic turning left with a green arrow. You can’t wait for 10 seconds until they are done and it’s your turn?
  • There was the lady driving a van yesterday who insisted she turn left, pushing herself through the first 2 of 3 lanes of traffic, only to get hit by an oncoming car in the 3rd lane. Honestly, you can’t see past the school bus and the city bus in the first two. If you were really in such a hurry, you just blew it.
  • There was the guy at the grocery store parking lot this weekend who yelled out his car window at us. He’d pulled half way out of his spot after we were most of the way out of ours just two spots down. We waited for him, and when he didn’t go we assumed he wanted us to go around him.
  • There are the drivers giving me angry looks for being in the crosswalk with a cross signal when they want to turn left on a yield signal.
  • There are people demanding the government give us more affordable health insurance so they don’t have to take care of their own bodies.
  • There are parents who get upset with public school teachers for not teaching their children when those same parents do nothing to encourage their children at home.

I don’t know about you, but I still routinely get strange looks when I say please, or thank you sir/miss/ma’am. It’s almost like they are shocked that someone is being polite to them. You see, in a small town, your ambulance service is your next door neighbor. That guy you just cut off in traffic will be sitting next to you at the diner tonight. Here in the city, it seems everyone wants to stay nameless and faceless. It just makes it easier to ignore those other people because “I’ll never see them again anyway.”

What strikes me as funny is that with all of this, people still seem surprised when corporate executives and politicians act the same way they do.  Should we really be surprised that our leaders act the same way we do?

They Don’t Build ‘em Like That Anymore

September 29, 2008 By: Curtis Category: my life, remodeling 2 Comments →

I don’t know if I ever related the story from this past spring about our dogs getting themselves locked in our downstairs bathroom.  We had put them in there to keep them out of the way of workers in the house for something or other.  The larger of the dogs (Harley) has learned to nudge doorknobs with his nose as a sign that he wants to go out.  Well, the bathroom has a small latch below the knob that locks the door with a bolt lock.  He managed to do this back then and get them both locked in there.  I tried removing the door knob, only to shatter the glass knob falling on the tile floor of the bathroom.  No luck trying to get the lock open from the outside.  Luckily, we had the window open (it was spring and nice out) so I was able to get a ladder and crawl through the window and open the door from the inside.

Since then, we just used some tape to hold the lock open and we’ve used that bathroom to keep the dogs on a number of occasions (especially during thunderstorms).  Increasingly over the past couple of months, we’ve come home to one or more of the dogs shut in the bathroom.  We open the door and he (them) come rushing out all excited.  We really wish we had a motion sensitive camera set up there to figure out exactly how this happens.

Well, this past Saturday, Harley showed us that the power of his nose is stronger than tape.  Yes, we came home and he was not only shut in the bathroom, but the door was locked as well.  Oh, and since we shut and locked all the windows in the house before leaving for vacation, there was no external access now to the bathroom.  I went through several scenarios before finally freeing the dog.

  1. I first tried the good old method of carding the lock.  I knew it was bolt lock and didn’t have a sloped side to card, but I also knew it was a very loose fit and maybe I could wiggle it enough to get it open.  No luck.
  2. Knowing how door frames are made, I thought I could just take the piece of trim off the outside of the door and then remove the stop piece from the jamb.  That would surely give me enough space to wiggle that lock open.  Well, after getting the trim piece off, it was discovered that the trim was actually holding up the adjacent wall.  As in, the plaster is now sagging off the lath right next to it.  I also found out, they didn’t use to make door jambs quite so cheap and flimsy as they do now.  The stop and the jamb, in my case, was one solid piece of wood.  To add to that, the the jamb wasn’t even a butt joint to the top of the frame, instead, the two pieces were set in a half-lap joint.  At this point, my wife said she’s never heard me say they did something right.  She’s right, to some extent.  What’s usually done wrong though is the remodeling over the years, not the original building, but that’s a whole other post.
  3. Getting a little nervous by now.  Since the plaster is loose anyway, maybe I can take a bit of it off and find the lock on the other side of the jamb.  No, I can see the tips of the screws sticking out from the strike plate, but I can’t get it the lock itself, and the angle is really funny to try and get a drill bit started.
  4. Even more nervous by now.  Back to my first idea from the last time.  I wasn’t looking forward to breaking another glass door knob though.  My wife had the brilliant idea at this point to shove a few kitchen towels under the door to provide a softer landing area (as it turns out, the door knob did get a small chip, but it was not in a thousand pieces like the last time, great thinking on her part).  After getting the door knob shoved out the other side (the only opening here is for the knob post), we bent a wire coat hanger around and got it pushed through the opening.  I gave up and let the wife have a turn while I thought about some other ideas.  I eventually gave it one more try and did manage to mangle the tape loose enough that I got the lock open.  This proved more challenging than you can imagine since, peering through the hole, there was a cat on the other side who was enjoying playing with this fun piece of wire sticking through the door.

It’s a good thing I got it open when I did.  I had 2 more ideas at this point.  One involved a drill to try and find the lock mechanism from the outside of the door.  The other idea involved a 2″x4″ and a sledge hammer.

Of course, after finally getting them out, I disassembled latch and removed the mortise lock from the door.  I opened it up and physically removed the bolt lock from inside.  Everything is back together now with the lock no longer functioning.

Needless to say, it was quite a stressful experience.  On another note, anyone know a good plaster repairer?

Return From Vacation

September 10, 2008 By: Curtis Category: blogging, my life 2 Comments →

We just made our way back from our family vacation on Monday.  It was 10 days of mostly good family time.  We made a few stops along our way out to Black Mountain, NC for a 5 day family conference on Unschooling.  It was the 7th (and last) Annual Live & Learn Conference.  If you are not familiar with the term Unschooling, which I’m sure very few people are, there is an excellent write-up over at Wikipedia.  We are relatively new to the concept and had a wonderful time meeting and learning from others.  Add to that spending 5, beautiful days in the Smokies and it makes for an even better experience.

While vacation left me thoroughly energized and refreshed, the start-up business I’ve been working on is in the midst of taking off (our first customer is waiting in the wings for us now).  I’m really hoping to get back into writing as I always seem to feel better when I’m writing.  There’s so much to say, but I have to admit, I’ve been paying very little attention to politics and general goings on around St. Louis the past few months.  It’s been more of a vegetative state as I recovered from over working and over teaching earlier this year.

Don’t count me out just yet!

Create Your Own Zoo, Right at Home!

May 09, 2008 By: Curtis Category: my life 1 Comment →

Do you love the zoo?  Wouldn’t it be great if you could have one of your very own?  We’ll, now you can, just follow my 16 easy steps.

  1. Marry and animal lover - this is a key point that is not to be over looked.  If your new spouse is allergic to pet dander, then your plan is sunk before you even get started.
  2. Get a puppy as your first pet - A key here is to try and find a puppy that will have emotional issues as he grows up.  That way it leads very nicely into step 4
  3. Now that you have a dog, move out of your apartment into your first house with a yard - The bigger the better, after all, if you’re going to have a zoo you’ll need some room.
  4. Now that you have a big yard and 1 dog with emotional issues, get a second dog as a companion - Make sure to get the cute dog that no one seemed to want, after all, that must mean it’s a great dog.
  5. Buy a REALLY good vacuum cleaner
  6. Let your emotionally challenged dog teach your new dog all his bad habits thus doubling the “fun”
  7. Let Santa bring your kid(s) stuff for guinea pigs and then go pick some out at the pet store - They should be old enough now to take care of them, so you won’t have to mess with them at all.
  8. Take care of the guinea pigs yourself
  9. Decide to move to another city to work for a French owned pet food company - With two dogs now the free dog food alone is worth the hassle
  10. Realize the free dog food isn’t worth it, move back to the city to a bigger house with a smaller yard and learn to pick up the yard
  11. Let your animal loving spouse talk you into a kitten - Don’t forget, this needs to be a special kitten to fight off the 2 dogs and take control of the house
  12. Train the cat to use the toilet - You spend enough time picking up after the dogs in the yard and cleaning the cage for the pigs, you don’t feel like cleaning up a litter box too.
  13. Realize that all wood floors with 2 dogs wasn’t such a good idea - This step is also be titled “Where the Hell did all this fur come from!”
  14. Your, now older, child(ren) decide they are now responsible enough for their own pet and ask to get a fish - You could possibly flip out here and think you are being over run or that your house will be taken over, so be careful
  15. Force your child(ren) to do research and write a report all about the fish they want, how to care for it, and put together a budget to purchase and care for it.
  16. When you hear your spouse talk about getting chickens for the yard and wanting a bird be prepared to have a cow, curl up into the fetal position and start crying.

Bus Stop Conversations

February 28, 2008 By: Curtis Category: city living, my life, transportation No Comments →

I’m constantly amazed the people you run into at a bus stop.  When I actually take the time to strike up a conversation with someone standing next to me, I’ve yet to be disappointed or turned off.  Yesterday was no exception.

A young gentleman got off the bus at my stop and asked if another bus had been by already.  I let him know it would be there in about 5 minutes because I’m used to watching it go by just before my bus.  I also noticed an interesting accent so I asked him about it.  Turns out he was originally from Ethiopia.  Well, my wife’s best friend growing up was part Ethiopian.  I’ve met both her and her mother who now makes and sell authentic Ethiopian lentil dips to local grocery stores. 

Turns out he runs an international food catering business.  I’d give him a plug, but he was out of business cards at the time.  We had a nice conversation over the next 5 minutes about food and I also found out that him and his wife only have 1 car as well.  He left it at home with her because she pregnant and expecting while he was out doing errands. 

It’s fun to meet and connect with local people.  I need to make more efforts to do that.  If you’re like me, I often feel so busy and hurried that I don’t take the time to get to know people.  Why not take a few minutes today and talk with a new stranger.  If you’re like me, you’ll find out they aren’t so strange after all!

Remembering

January 21, 2008 By: Curtis Category: my life No Comments →

It’s Martin Luther King Jr. Day.  The bus was empty except for the driver, myself and one other person.  Today I wanted to share with you the famous King “I have a dream” speech.  I got the text from over at American Rhetoric.  They have the full length video of the speech as well if you want to check it out.

I am happy to join with you today in what will go down in history as the greatest demonstration for freedom in the history of our nation.

Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand today, signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice. It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of their captivity.

But one hundred years later, the Negro still is not free. One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chains of discrimination. One hundred years later, the Negro lives on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity. One hundred years later, the Negro is still languished in the corners of American society and finds himself an exile in his own land. And so we’ve come here today to dramatize a shameful condition.

In a sense we’ve come to our nation’s capital to cash a check. When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir. This note was a promise that all men, yes, black men as well as white men, would be guaranteed the “unalienable Rights” of “Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” It is obvious today that America has defaulted on this promissory note, insofar as her citizens of color are concerned. Instead of honoring this sacred obligation, America has given the Negro people a bad check, a check which has come back marked “insufficient funds.”

But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt. We refuse to believe that there are insufficient funds in the great vaults of opportunity of this nation. And so, we’ve come to cash this check, a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice.

We have also come to this hallowed spot to remind America of the fierce urgency of Now. This is no time to engage in the luxury of cooling off or to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism. Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of segregation to the sunlit path of racial justice. Now is the time to lift our nation from the quicksands of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood. Now is the time to make justice a reality for all of God’s children.

It would be fatal for the nation to overlook the urgency of the moment. This sweltering summer of the Negro’s legitimate discontent will not pass until there is an invigorating autumn of freedom and equality. Nineteen sixty-three is not an end, but a beginning. And those who hope that the Negro needed to blow off steam and will now be content will have a rude awakening if the nation returns to business as usual. And there will be neither rest nor tranquility in America until the Negro is granted his citizenship rights. The whirlwinds of revolt will continue to shake the foundations of our nation until the bright day of justice emerges.

But there is something that I must say to my people, who stand on the warm threshold which leads into the palace of justice: In the process of gaining our rightful place, we must not be guilty of wrongful deeds. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred. We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again, we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force.

The marvelous new militancy which has engulfed the Negro community must not lead us to a distrust of all white people, for many of our white brothers, as evidenced by their presence here today, have come to realize that their destiny is tied up with our destiny. And they have come to realize that their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom.

We cannot walk alone.

And as we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall always march ahead.

We cannot turn back.

There are those who are asking the devotees of civil rights, “When will you be satisfied?” We can never be satisfied as long as the Negro is the victim of the unspeakable horrors of police brutality. We can never be satisfied as long as our bodies, heavy with the fatigue of travel, cannot gain lodging in the motels of the highways and the hotels of the cities. *We cannot be satisfied as long as the negro’s basic mobility is from a smaller ghetto to a larger one. We can never be satisfied as long as our children are stripped of their self-hood and robbed of their dignity by a sign stating: “For Whites Only.”* We cannot be satisfied as long as a Negro in Mississippi cannot vote and a Negro in New York believes he has nothing for which to vote. No, no, we are not satisfied, and we will not be satisfied until “justice rolls down like waters, and righteousness like a mighty stream.”

I am not unmindful that some of you have come here out of great trials and tribulations. Some of you have come fresh from narrow jail cells. And some of you have come from areas where your quest — quest for freedom left you battered by the storms of persecution and staggered by the winds of police brutality. You have been the veterans of creative suffering. Continue to work with the faith that unearned suffering is redemptive. Go back to Mississippi, go back to Alabama, go back to South Carolina, go back to Georgia, go back to Louisiana, go back to the slums and ghettos of our northern cities, knowing that somehow this situation can and will be changed.

Let us not wallow in the valley of despair, I say to you today, my friends.

And so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.”

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

I have a dream today!

I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of “interposition” and “nullification” — one day right there in Alabama little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.

I have a dream today!

I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, and every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight; “and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed and all flesh shall see it together.”

This is our hope, and this is the faith that I go back to the South with.

With this faith, we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith, we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith, we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.

And this will be the day — this will be the day when all of God’s children will be able to sing with new meaning:

My country ’tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing.

Land where my fathers died, land of the Pilgrim’s pride,

From every mountainside, let freedom ring!

And if America is to be a great nation, this must become true.

And so let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire.

Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York.

Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of
  Pennsylvania.

Let freedom ring from the snow-capped Rockies of Colorado.

Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of California.

But not only that:

Let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia.

Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee.

Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Mississippi.

From every mountainside, let freedom ring.

And when this happens, when we allow freedom ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God’s children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual:

Free at last! Free at last!

Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!

King was a great man of vision. This country still struggles at times with the segregation and racism. My small country town often played host to local KKK meetings on nearby farms. Rumor was there was still a law on the books that all blacks must be out of town by sundown. Not having any police officers, it was obviously unenforced. I still remember when the interracial couple moved in two doors down from us. They were very nice people. A military family working at the air force base a few miles away. It was just a few weeks after they moved in when someone made the comment to my father when we were out at dinner at the town cafe, “How you like living next to them checkered folks?” My father ignored them. I could tell he took offense to what was said. You see, I may have been raised in a backwoods, redneck, racist area, but my parents taught me better. They showed me by example why there is no need to discriminate against other people. My hats off to them and I hope I am instilling that same virtue in my son.

While my parents raised me to not hate those of another color, there were very few minorities living in the area.  The unknown is frightening.  You see stories in the paper and on the news of inner city violence.  Even today, the media seems to portray blacks as violent.  For people growing up like me, that paints a picture that is hard to get over, even with a strong upbringing like mine.  Despite all of that, I share the same dream as Dr. King.  I’ve had many labels in my life.  Everything from geek to jock.  I didn’t care for any of them.  The dream is to go beyond not only the color of our skins, but also beyond every outward appearance.  There is no need for blondes, brunettes, redheads, etc.  We are all God’s children.  The “content of our character” is the real key to Dr. King’s dream.

I realized how much my life lacked in diversity when I went to a wedding of my wife’s best friend.  The wedding was between a woman who was part Ethiopian and part Dutch.  Her husband was German.  They were married in a Jewish Synagogue.  It was wonderful. 

Take time today to not just remember the man, but to remember the dream as well.  Forge ahead. But let’s not do it alone.

We cannot walk alone.

And as we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall always march ahead.

We cannot turn back.